The only thing keeping Shen Wei somewhere approaching calm—after seeing his brother free and trying to siphon Zhao Yunlan's energy, after realising that the Dial had protected Zhao Yunlan only to have left him unconscious on the ground—was the memory of Kunlun.
Kunlun, who had Zhao Yunlan's face. Who had Zhao Yunlan's gun. Who had cared for him, just as inexplicably as Zhao Yunlan now did. Who had known things that Zhao Yunlan did not know, and had looked at him with kind eyes and seen him in more ways than Shen Wei had thought possible.
Waking him up had been simple. Hearing his voice had been a relief. Realising the true extent of the backlash knocked the words out of him.
“Let me—” he said, keeping his voice steady by long habit, and reached towards Zhao Yunlan’s unflinching face. So brave, he whispered to himself, and in such dangerous ways. He breathed, turned the thought aside—he couldn’t risk such distractions—and allowed his fingertips to brush against Zhao Yunlan’s forehead. He needed to be certain that Zhao Yunlan could tell where his hand was and what he was doing, and he was rewarded by Zhao Yunlan's fingers wrapping loosely around his wrist.
There was no push or pull; his grasp was simply a point of connection between them as Zhao Yunlan looked straight at him with unseeing eyes.
Shen Wei met his gaze and released his power, focusing on not Zhao Yunlan’s eyes but his energy.
He hadn’t examined Zhao Yunlan this closely before; he’d been too busy making sure that Zhao Yunlan was still alive. Now that he was peering beyond the simple heartbeat-pulse that meant life, the full effects of both Ye Zun’s power and the Dial’s protection were easy to find. Everything was more muted, more stagnant, than usual for someone of Zhao Yunlan’s youth. Shen Wei gave his own life to Zhao Yunlan without thinking about it, his soul the air that the bellows of his power fed to Zhao Yunlan’s fiery soul.
This strengthening of Zhao Yunlan’s energy drew Shen Wei’s attention to the one place where the weaving threads of light were broken, and he forced himself not to flinch. This deep into Zhao Yunlan—whose open trust was terrifying, was rewarding, was something Shen Wei hadn’t expected to be granted—he couldn’t falter without potentially harming them both, and he couldn’t bear the thought of shredding anything further than his brother had already managed.
The structure of light connecting Zhao Yunlan's eyes to his soul was in tatters.
Shen Wei had seen the remnants of Ye Zun’s power on other bodies he had drained and discarded. Those were left with nothing, the entirety of their life ripped out and swallowed by Ye Zun’s endless thirst. Here, there were remnants, wispy roots reaching across emptiness in search of something to grasp onto.
Shen Wei let his own energy (black as dreams, blue as dusk; a stain against the vibrancy of Zhao Yunlan's white-cored flame) coil and stretch around what remained, trying to form a trellis to encourage their growth. This wasn’t what his healing gift was meant for—he had learned it from a doctor who encouraged blood vessels to clot, nerves to regrow, bones to mend; all the physiological processes of healing happened more quickly with the careful infusion of black energy into the cells.
He was pushing it to its limits, moving beyond its purpose and into something that had nothing to do with any specific Dixingren power at all.
He was working with pure energy now, and he was good at that—his gift, like Ye Zun’s, relied on such skill—but the muted traces of Hallowed energy kept rejecting any attempt Shen Wei made to leave a lasting trace. It recognises me, Shen Wei realised, and halted his efforts. If he kept forcing his will upon the Dial, it would simply believe him another interloper to be denied access to that which it had been called upon to protect. It would see him as no better than his brother.
Shen Wei did not like failing, but he couldn’t accomplish anything further, not with an aching head and his own growing exhaustion from calling upon greater depths of his strength than Haixing normally called for.
Reluctantly, he pulled back, drawing his power back into his own heart, and opened his eyes. His hand lingered above Zhao Yunlan’s eyes for a moment, then dropped to brush against his cheek on the way to clasping Zhao Yunlan’s wrist in turn.
“I’m sorry,” Shen Wei said, infusing as much sincerity and emotion as he could into the simple words. “I can’t heal your eyes. I should have been here sooner.”
If he'd realised what was happening when Zhao Yunlan left, if he'd tracked Zhao Yunlan's path more closely, if he'd kept a closer eye on Ye Zun—
Zhao Yunlan shook his head, as if he could hear Shen Wei’s thoughts. “You made it in time,” he said, and squeezed Shen Wei’s wrist.
Shen Wei pressed his lips together. Zhao Yunlan's faith was one of the most beautiful and maddening things about him. He couldn’t have known that Shen Wei would arrive before the Dial and Ye Zun drained him to complete collapse, and yet he had believed in Shen Wei’s abilities. He had entrusted his life to Shen Wei’s attention and speed, and—
Zhu Hong coughed slightly. “Excuse me,” she said, more than a little exaggerated, and Shen Wei glanced at her, unsure if he was relieved by the interruption. “Black-Cloaked Envoy?”
That secret was lost. A worthwhile trade for Zhao Yunlan’s continued life, but Shen Wei would still miss the protection of his professorial mask. “Yes?” he asked, pulling his hand away from Zhao Yunlan’s. He kept his arm wrapped around Zhao Yunlan’s back; that was a different kind of support, and Shen Wei couldn’t bear to lose the contact.
“Were you ever planning on telling us?” She slapped Zhao Yunlan’s shoulder accusingly. “Either of you?”
Shen Wei looked back at Zhao Yunlan, unsurprised to see his face already tilted up in a smile. “It wasn't my secret to share,” Zhao Yunlan said with a shrug. “I did my digging for the truth. There wasn't anything that would harm you or the SID, Zhu Hong. Why not let him keep his air of mystery?”
“I didn't wish to interfere with your work.” Shen Wei inclined his head in a slight bow. “I am sorry if I did nonetheless.”
“You—” Zhu Hong threw up her hands in disgust, leaving all of Zhao Yunlan’s weight to Shen Wei. “You could have helped more if we’d known!”
Shen Wei’s gaze dropped. “There are other factors.” Dixing would never permit him to serve openly in a Haixing office. He could not allow his Dixing identity to draw danger into his students’ lives. Revealing himself earlier would have meant more suspicion from the SID about why he was now monitoring them so closely after years of nearly ignoring them.
“It’s done,” Zhao Yunlan said loudly, interrupting. He clapped a hand on Shen Wei’s shoulder, finding it properly on the third try. “You said something about taking me home, Shen Wei?”
“Yes.” Shen Wei didn’t bother hiding his strength as he stood and drew Zhao Yunlan upright with him. Zhao Yunlan leaned into his support, and Shen Wei clutched him more tightly. He couldn’t fix this, but he could take care of Zhao Yunlan until they found another way to solve it. He took a deep breath, then nodded his head in the slightest bow to Zhu Hong. “We will be leaving.”
Zhao Yunlan tossed a wave in Zhu Hong’s general vicinity “Don’t be late for work tomorrow!”
“You’re going to—” Zhu Hong cut herself off with a shake of her head and instead finished her sentence by ordering, “Take care of yourself!”
“I’ll make sure he does,” Shen Wei said quietly, when Zhao Yunlan just laughed with all the projected confidence he was so fond of.
Zhu Hong met his eyes, and Shen Wei felt a brief pulse of the power she had yet to grow into. After a moment, she nodded. “Then I’ll be going, since you clearly don’t need my help.”
“Zhu Hong—” Zhao Yunlan called, but she made no answer, and he let it go with a sigh. That, more than anything, told Shen Wei how exhausted he must be underneath his unconcerned facade.
Shen Wei watched her go, then turned Zhao Yunlan towards the nearest road. He might be able to use black energy to move himself, but he didn’t want to risk exposing Zhao Yunlan to any more Dixingren powers; there was enough complicating his body’s wellbeing as it was. “Come,” he said softly, and Zhao Yunlan began to walk alongside him, their footfalls matching so precisely that they sounded like a single person moving across the grass.
“I’ll be fine,” Zhao Yunlan said, after a minute of companionable silence. He patted Shen Wei’s hand with a brilliant smile. “Between everyone, we’ll find a cure in no time!”
Shen Wei nodded, remembered Zhao Yunlan couldn’t see the motion, and said—trying to give as much faith to Zhao Yunlan as he was given in return—”I’m sure we will.”